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E-mail me if u wanna continue with this blog where I am heading. erm. make sense of THAT!

xo audge @


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I am incomplete. I am a lost little person in a non-connected world. Wondering WTF I’m talking about?
I lost my friggin’ cell phone.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I don’t know anything except its my fault and I deserve this. The Karma Gods’ are attacking me but I’ve been good lately…Or so I thought. You can never betray those karma gods.. they are always watching..

I’m actually really sad about it. That phone made me feel like a superstar. I guess this is a good kick in the ass reminding me of the very simple and boring life I lead. Oh, le sighe, how I wish I was Katy Perry, kissing girls. Just kidding.

but damn, I wish I never lost my friggin’ cell phone.

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Things about me;

1. Right now, I have an unbearable stomach ache.

2. I’m obsessed with death but not in a morbid sense, moreso a inquisitive mind.

3.As a little girl, I had the best imagination. I can remember sitting there, on my couch, for 12 hours, pretending it was a ship.

4. I adore coffee.

5. I am on a NO MSG diet. Fun.

6. I love my job but I struggle with internal issues regarding stuff I face daily.

7. My co-workers are my friends.

8. I love my new SUV. its pretty. I bought it with a dent.

9. My boyfriend tucks me into bed each and every night.

10. I sleep with a stugged shark.

11. I love going for walks with my dog. He makes me happy.

12. I once thought I was bipolar but I realize I’m just overly depressed.

13. I found out my depression started with a car accident my family got in, in Sept 2008. I almost lost them all.

14. My mom is my best friend. Shes white with red hair. Adorable.

15. I’m native but almost everyone I know asks me If I’m asian.

16. I wish I was taller with my long hair.

17. I get embarrassed shopping at La Senza because I have to go to the A section.

18. I don’t like to spend money on expensive clothes. I shop thrift and consignment.

19. My boyfriend has a fashion sense so well that he is a metrosexual. Most people just call him gay.

20. Trust me, he isn’t.

21. Our first time drinking, I got slammed and said, “If you ARE gay, let me know because… I love you.” Romantic, eh?

22. I know at my job we aren’t supposed to have favorite youth, but I secretly do. It doesn’t affect my job.

23. I live paycheck to paycheck. I hate those last 5 friggin days!

24. I have 24.00 in my bank account until Thursday. Blahhhh.

25. I love reading books, especially classics. I always go to SparkNotes.Com to assist me.

26. I want to return to school one day to finish my degree. Ew.

27. I am ADHD and don’t take medication but I don’t feel I need too. I have a job where energy is thrived upon.

28. Regardless, I’m addicted to coffee.

29. I wish I was dating Edward Cullen. *laugh*

30. I miss my dad more then words can say.

31. I wish my sister and her family.. well, I wish I was closer with them.

32. I struggle with feeling good about taking time off work and just enjoying my life. Workaholic I guess.

33. I’m petrified of my bosses but I also would happily call them my best ones yet!

34. When I really struggle with a kid and start getting frustrated and exhausted, I think of the ten seconds of the worst moment of their life. It rejuvenates me.

35. Working with kids is my life. I love them all.

36. I’ve been sent to the ER from attacks I’ve had from children.

37. I have a blackberry curve cell phone.

38. I love trash T.V but not dumb shit like Maury.

39. Although, sometimes, I want to download a Maury porno just to see what its like. Uncensored, I guess. I have NO clue why.

40. I like the free movie documentaries on my t.v

41. I want my boyfriend to be happy.

42. I want to move to Vancouver eventually.

43. I am pumped to do Yoga.

44. I’m scared that I’ll look like an idiot infront of everyone.

45. Sometimes, I worry about weird shit such as grease exploding in my face and being mutilated- will anyone still stand by me? dumb, I know.

46. I constantly wonder what my dads last thoughts were.

47. Sometimes, I hate blogging because everyone is so fabulous at it and I feel stupid. Then I remember, its my blog and its not a social contest. I just feel inferior I guess.

48. I want to save the world and recycle tons more.

49. My dog pissed on my duvet. It makes me sad.

50. It costs 30-40$ just to fix.

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Time: 9:57am






Wearing: White embossed hoodie, black tanktop, ‘silver’ jeans, white socks, brown boots.

Listening to: Boyfriend sleeping.. shhhhh…

To do: haul ass off computer chair and do budgetting.

love, audge and fenris.


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What a Statement!


How gorgie are these? I want them. I am going to buy them. Perhaps.

tecnica_moon-boots_schwarz_black Awesome.

Meeting Elizabeth was shockingly pleasent. She is a wonderful lady. I don’t even know how it happened but I just had word vomit and it all came out. And, SHE LISTENED WITHOUT JUDGING. Shock.

So on the homefront, that went lovely.

On the downfront, I have a rash from this damn medication. I’ll live.

On the upfront, I’m joining a yoga course in February, a French course in April, and a new casual position at the womens shelter.

On the medicore-front, debating if I should/could give up the daycare job. Juggling 5 jobs isn’t healthy for anyone.

On the $$$-front, broke as a joke, but dang, I want em’ booties!

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Today, I am going to visit my counsellor for the first time. All I know is that her name is Elizabeth and my mom likes her. My mom has referred everyone she knows there including my ex- (and current…) boyfriend, and my childhood best friend.

I feel like I’m going in for an interview. I feel like I need todo my hair and make up, put on some fabity fab clothes, and give the message, “no, really, I’m not a fuckup. This is all a misunderstanding.”

I made the comment to a friend of feeling like, “I’m going there to get judged.” She laughed, and said, “well, aren’t you? I mean, your going and saying, ‘all this shit is wrong with me and you tell me how to deal with it…” although you had to be there to see the hand gestures she made. Hilarious.

How the hell do you begin? “So, I’m Audrey and I’m here because I’m sad all the time and can’t stop crying?” … *re-adjust pose in the mirror and say cheerfully* “Hey Sup, I’m Audrey… *re-adjust, le sighe” Hi, My name is Audrey and you know my mom…”

Bingo. So we’ve figured out the greeting but what of relaying the actual message of being a screwed up mind at its greatest?

I give up and I’m letting the chips fall where they may.

Blah. I don’t want to go. I’m obviously very worked up about it since I’ve been awake since 6:30, chatting about this exact prediciment to my stuffed shark in bed.

Tell you how it goes…


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Coffee Smoffeee

Drinking excessive coffee can lead to breast reduction? I drink about 4-5 cups PER day and I’m a size A. Awesome.

and taking regular hits of caffeine reduces the risk of breast cancer.[74] Coffee appears to reduce the risk of Alzheimer’s disease, Parkinson’s disease, heart disease, diabetes mellitus type 2, cirrhosis of the liver,[75] and gout. (Wikipedia)

But the main reason for this post wasn’t about the HEALTH effects of Coffee…Although I was quite surprised, it is mainly about my next Etsy Purchase!


I love the dragonfly. For me, it resembles being able to adapt to all situations given and still thrive. It is a very resilient insect. For more by this amazing artist, click me.

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